A couple on an African Safari .......
Witnessed a small antelope being chased down by a cheetah.
While the kill was about to happen before their eyes,
The husband casually remarked,
“I’ll bet the antelope gets away.”
The wife answered,
“If that antelope survives this one,
I’ll give you sex every day for the rest of your life.”
The deadly chase was recorded.
Click below.....
https://www.youtube.com/embed/DYDIwOnXNc8
" Truth is often deemed rude, blunt and to the point which is why so few make their friend " Freddy Hayler ..352-267-1553 Sanford, FLA Gutterman6000@Gmail.com
Excellent !! A man has to do what he has got to do !!Originally Posted by Steve 0080
" Truth is often deemed rude, blunt and to the point which is why so few make their friend " Freddy Hayler ..352-267-1553 Sanford, FLA Gutterman6000@Gmail.com
" Truth is often deemed rude, blunt and to the point which is why so few make their friend " Freddy Hayler ..352-267-1553 Sanford, FLA Gutterman6000@Gmail.com
Steve, I am pretty sure you got to stick with the gifs.
OMG I thought that I was on HUMP day. I'm sorry.
Sorry, but it was still funny...
" Truth is often deemed rude, blunt and to the point which is why so few make their friend " Freddy Hayler ..352-267-1553 Sanford, FLA Gutterman6000@Gmail.com
A young cowboy, sitting in a saloon one Saturday night, recognized an elderly man standing at the bar who,in his day, had been the fastest gun in the West.
The cowboy walked over to the old-timer, bought him a drink and told him of his great ambition to be a great gunfighter.
"Could you give me some tips?" he asked.
The old man said, "Well, for one thing, you're wearing your gun too high -- tie the holster a little lower down on your leg."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?"
"Sure will."*
The young man did as he was told, then stood up, whipped out his .44, and shot the bow tie off the piano player.*
"That's terrific!" exclaimed the cowboy. "Got any more tips?"
"Yep," said the old man. "Cut a notch out of your holster where the hammer hits it -- that'll give you a smoother draw."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the young man.
"You bet it will," said the old-timer.
The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his gun in a blur, and then shot a cuff link off the piano player.
"Wow!" said the cowboy excitedly, "I'm learnin' somethin' here. Got any more tips?"
The old man pointed to a large can in a corner of the saloon. "See that can of axle grease over there?
Coat your gun with it."
The young man smeared some of the grease on the barrel of his gun.
"No," said the old-timer, "I mean smear it all over the gun, the handle, and all."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the puzzled young man.
"No," said the old-timer, "but when Wyatt Earp gets done playing the piano, he's gonna shove that gun up your ass, and it won't hurt as much."
21 years Army (retired)
...been everywhere, seen everything, done almost everything.
IBA 80537
In a Parish Church in the English countryside, A World War II Spitfire pilot is speaking and reminiscing about his war experiences.
"In 1942," he says, "the situation was really tough. The Germans had a very strong air force. I remember," he continues, "one day I was protecting the bombers and suddenly, out of the clouds, these fokkers appeared."
There are a few gasps from the parishioners, and several of the children began to giggle.
"I looked up, and realized that two of the fokkers were directly above me. I aimed at the first one and shot him down. By then, though, the other fokker was right on my tail."
At this point, several of the elderly ladies of the church were blushing with embarrassment, the girls were all giggling and the boys laughing loudly.
The vicar finally stands up and says, "I think I should point out that 'Fokker' was the name of a German-Dutch aircraft company, who made many of the planes used by the Germans during the war."
"Yes, that's true," says the old pilot, "but these fokkers were flying Messerschmitts."
21 years Army (retired)
...been everywhere, seen everything, done almost everything.
IBA 80537
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