PHONE REPAIR

A Kansas farm wife called the local phone
company to report her telephone failed to ring when her
friends called and that on the few occasions, when it did
ring, her dog always moaned right before the
phone rang.
The telephone repairman proceeded to the
scene, curious to see this psychic dog or senile lady.
He climbed a telephone pole, hooked in his
test set, and dialed the subscriber's house.
The phone didn't ring right away, but
then the dog moaned and the telephone began to ring.
Climbing down from the pole, the telephone
repairman found:

1 . The dog was tied to the telephone
system's ground wire with a steel chain and collar.

2. The wire connection to the ground rod
was loose.

3. The dog was receiving 90 volts of
signaling current when the number was called.

4. After a couple of jolts, the dog would
start moaning and then urinate.

5. The wet ground would complete the
circuit, thus causing the phone to ring.

Which demonstrates that some problems CAN
be fixed by pissing and moaning.
Just thought you'd like to know.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Westernbiker

A Kansas farm wife called the local phone
company to report her telephone failed to ring when her
friends called and that on the few occasions, when it did
ring, her dog always moaned right before the
phone rang.
The telephone repairman proceeded to the
scene, curious to see this psychic dog or senile lady.
He climbed a telephone pole, hooked in his
test set, and dialed the subscriber's house.
The phone didn't ring right away, but
then the dog moaned and the telephone began to ring.
Climbing down from the pole, the telephone
repairman found:

1 . The dog was tied to the telephone
system's ground wire with a steel chain and collar.

2. The wire connection to the ground rod
was loose.

3. The dog was receiving 90 volts of
signaling current when the number was called.

4. After a couple of jolts, the dog would
start moaning and then urinate.

5. The wet ground would complete the
circuit, thus causing the phone to ring.

Which demonstrates that some problems CAN
be fixed by pissing and moaning.
Just thought you'd like to know.

---

Westernbiker
You're using some specific terms:
"hooked in his test set, dialed the subscriber's house, 90 volts of signaling current" were/are you CWA member?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by taxfree4

Westernbiker
You're using some specific terms:
"hooked in his test set, dialed the subscriber's house, 90 volts of signaling current" were/are you CWA member?

---

Taxfree,
No I'm not a CWA member. I am an electrical application engineer for a large electrical distributor in Phoenix, with many years in the field. I have dabbled in telephone circuitry a tad in my years.
But I cannot take credit for the joke, as it was told to me in the same manner. :icon_mrgreen:

Well I can truly appreciate that joke as it hit home. I am retired Ma Bell service technician and that joke reminded me of a trouble I shot once. Lady lived on the ground floor of a building and every time she was on the phone talking her conversations would be going along fine and she would get cut off and horrible static, a couple of minutes and dial tone would come back clear as a bell, she would call back it would cut off etc. Cables, pairs, wires, telephones were changed-nothing helped same thing. They sent me on it because I like a project and said don't come back till it's fixed. I monitored the line for days - same scenario. I was monitoring her line from the house box in the hallway and noticed every time the elevator hit the lobby that is when the phone would cut off. After sending the elevator up and back, being able to duplicate the problem, I had the super send the car up and open the door to the shaft. Sure enough the house box lead cable had broken away from its' clamp and was now in the path of the elevator car, which rubbed the lead and protective covering of the wire exposing the copper line to the metal of the car. Got a day off for that one. Sorry to ramble but thanks for the memory, that was one of those jobs you never forget, 25 years later.

Not to be outdone by you phone guys, But us old cable guys have some stories too.....
Once, I had a call for a lady( why is it always a lady?) who had trouble with channels 19, and 20. would come on and off like clockwork every 5 seconds. turns out it would happen all over the neighborhood. for days, I worked the problem back and could not find any problem, but again every 5 seconds it went off for about a second and back on for 5 seconds, then off again... finally grabbed a bucket truck, and intern, and went over the Ariel cable hand over hand. found squirrel chew directly in front of a northrup grumman radar placement that rotated every 5 seconds.... who woudda known

Attachment 10756

We had our share of squirrel trouble, they used it like dental floss and every time it rained half a block would be shorted out till the sun came out and dried it up. It was like guaranteed work so you didn't mind. Rumor has it the old splicers used to urinate in the splice before they lead wiped it and the acid would eat away at everything so they would be back there to repair it.