Proof that black is the slowest color

[coffee_weasle]

It is a fact that white reflects all colors of light, and black absorbs all colors of light. The brighter that it is outside, the more light that a black F6B will absorb. The more light it absorbs, the heavier it becomes, thus slowing it down

Logic dictates that with enough riding, a black F6B will become so overweight with absorbed colors that it will eventually be unable to move under its own power.

wouldn't the forward facing paint draw the light to it, and in effect draw the bike faster forward?